’ I heard some slurping sounds. ‘Oy!’ Martin exclaimed. ‘I’d better get the chillies off to Uncle Ernie’s.’ ‘Hey, wait!’ Mum yelled. ‘I’m not dre…’ The door opened and Martin came out with a pair of shorts and a T-shirt in his hands. His willie was not really soft, but thick and sticking out a lot. I could see Mum naked, frantically grabbing a dressing gown from the hook on the wall, white stuff running down her leg. She had big breasts with huge nipples and large aureoles, just like Jo. She gave me a guilty look as she donned the dressing gown. ‘Come on, stop gawking at your mum — that’s my job.’ Martin swatted my bum. Holy jubilee, I’d just seen my Mum naked. And it made my willie hard. But then again, almost anything made my willie hard. ‘B1oody hell, it’s your dressing gown, it’s too small and there’s no belt for it.’ Mum came out the door holding the dressing gown together with her right hand, not really doing a good job. We could see her ginny and most of her tits. Martin was. That would have resulted in her receiving a bang on the head from the trap door as it sprang shut. To evade that possibility we agreed that I should fall with her into the bean bag, with my head and torso still under her skirt. This wasn’t as exciting as it sounds, because underneath the costume she wore a two piece flesh coloured Spandex body leotard, and as soon as we landed she would pause briefly to retrieve her hem, recover her eyesight, then dash off to prepare for her next entry. The playwright had written the scenes so she had plenty of time after each of these difficult exits before making her next entry, but with opening night angst rising steadily, Arlene’s nerves would not allow her to relax for a moment during rehearsals. Opening night was even more frantic. I was as jittery as the rest of the cast and crew, anxious to get everything right, and worried that I would be the one to make the blunder that would ruin the entire show. When Arlene fell into my arms that night I.
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